Top 3 revision

1. Comparison of my Bottle - Sophia. I think it is a really good writing because she did explain in detail about the different between two bottles. I hope she can have more vivid language and maybe reorganize the paragraph so the reader are able to understand which bottle she is talking about.

2. Walk among dream and truth - Leo. I like the way he describe the background. It is just like I'm also in that place when I read his story. Maybe instead of repeat I this word, he can use some transition or other vivd language in his writing. This will defiantly help his writing become better.

3. Somewhere safe - Nina. It is really interesting because she observed under her desk, which no one did it in our class. This is why I'm interesting about her writing, and use more vivid language will help her writing become more interesting and the reader will able to feel confidence about sitting under their desk.